Monday, April 20, 2009

108 days to go.....

I figured out today that I have exactly 108 days to go until I turn 40.   I have to admit, I am really having difficulty wrapping my head around age 40.  I think it's because I still think of myself as 27 years old, that 4o just doesn't seem possible.   It's just can't be right, can it?   So, here I sit, on the precipice of middle age, in the worst shape of my life.   Sure, I'm running, but I would not say I am in peak condition.  I just can't seem to get in the groove.   I keep trying to diet, but I am failing miserably at that.   Life is really complicated at present and I am struggling to get passionate about anything.   I know that I want to record this milestone by doing something fantastic that I can be proud of, but I am having a hard time pulling it together to do it.  Why is that?  Any thoughts, ideas?  I am appealing to you, the three people who read this for your advice.  Let me know what you think.   In the meantime, I'll keep chugging along.  Maybe if I can kick this cold, I will find my MOJO.  Here's hoping.
shuffling off

3 comments:

Marker said...

You know I love you but I think you are making to much out of a number......just live, be happy, and set littel goals evey day. littel things add up to the big stuff

Andy Gehrisch said...

Jill,

I completely understand what you are saying. I was in a "funk" for about 2 months before turning 40. Frankly, I was looking backwards way too much. Wondering if I had achieved the things I wanted to do, regretting some of the things I didn't take advantage of and second guessing the decisions I had made and wondering where I would be if I had made different ones.

I think it is natural to pause for a second, take stock of where you are and come to terms with hitting the mid way point. It gives us perspective on the events we will be facing going forward.

The key is to let it go once the day arrives. We're never going to be in our 20's again. Our bodies are not likely to look or feel any better than they do now and the future is uncertain.

But after reaching 40, I realized I've lived life to the fullest. I've done a ton of things most people can't say they've done. My kids are growing up healthy and well adjusted and I've been lucky with so many things so far that looking back just doesn't matter other than to realize my life has been pretty good so far.

As for the big day, you'll find its no different than any other. It's just a particular square on a calendar somewhere. Have a drink, toast yourself and your life and turn your focus forward so you can continue to enjoy life like you have for the first 40 years.

owner said...

I just can't add any more then what Andy Gehrisch said.
He said it all it is just another day.
Love Dad Parker